Ignorance is Never Bliss

Lately, I’ve been thinking about all the pain I ignore around me. I see beggars everyday and walk by, sometimes not even looking in their faces because it makes me feel guilty. When I go to the beach, I am not always patient with the sellers  trying to thread my leg hair or sell me yet another bracelet. Sometimes I’m rude and say somewhat briskly in Khmer, “No, I don’t want!” and get back to reading my book. Whether it’s failing to smile at the person walking past, or not taking the time to talk to a friend that really needs me, I realize that in ignoring all these tiny things, I am becoming more and more desensitized to the hurt around me.

A big wakeup call happened when my sister and I visited Teol Sleng in Phnom Penh. The site is a high school that was turned into a prison for torture and execution during the Khmer Rouge. The people were taken there to be interrogated and tortured. Each prisoner was numbered and photographed upon arrival. Animal like cells were fashioned of bricks and wood to confine the prisoners till their deaths. We walked through the narrow cells and saw some of the instruments they used to torture the “accused.”

                                          

I ran my hands across the rough bricks and looked into the faces of hundreds of people that were murdered, all the while thinking, “I had no idea.” Over twenty thousand men, women and children were executed in that high school alone. When the Vietnamese army liberated Cambodia, there were only seven prisoners left alive in the prison. The rest had been electrocuted, waterboarded, seared with hot metal instruments and beaten to their deaths.

As I walked into one of the makeshift cells, I thought the person that crafted this cell knew it was meant to hold a human being. I wondered, did they stop and think about how their actions would affect someone, or did they force themselves to block out all emotion and go on with the task at hand?

 

 

It’s an extreme example, but think about how it applies to your daily life. How many times do you shut off your emotions and “go on with your life.” How many times do you change the channel when you see big bellies full of nothing but parasites? How many times do you listen to the guest missionary at your church talk about hunger, disease, lack of resources and afterwards go out to a nice brunch with your friends? How many times do you watch celebrity gossip shows instead of educating yourself on the things that are really going on in this world?

I know we all do these things more often than we would like to admit. But we can change. Let’s allow ourselves to hurt for other people. Let’s stop turning our heads and hearts away from things that cause us discomfort. Let’s stop living in our own ignorance and choose each day, to live in love, no matter the cost.

May these innocent faces remind you, ignorance is never bliss.

 

Crickets, Ears and other Edibles

After a long run in the heat, I'm in the mood to sit in front of the fan and not do much of anything. I've decided to be slightly productive and amuse myself by recapping a few of the Cambodian foods I've tried, so here goes...

Raw oysters- Not enjoyable, but not bad either. They tasted like slimy, sandy things dipped in chili sauce.

  Pig ear- Sliced up and put in my sandwich. I wasn't much of a fan. It was quite chewy and not so tasty.

 

Bugs!

Cricket- This sweet lady was so happy I was trying her food and I'm glad I did. The fried cricket was actually really good. It was seasoned and was a nice, crunchy snack.



Squid- With tentacles. One of my favorites actually. Once you get used to the texture, it's really good in stir fry. 



Yummy food with good friends :)

  A few things I've turned down:
 Partly developed chicken
Pigs blood


Unagi- Eel sushi. I've tried, but sushi still isn't my thing.




Enjoying rice, steamed fish and goat meat at a wedding.

 So, you may be entertained or grossed out- either way, the moral of the story is don't be afraid to try new things, you might be surprised.

Update

So it’s been awhile…. Life here has been busy, and hot. My sister Katie came to visit in April and it was so good to see her again. We went to the ancient temples in Siem Riep, saw the sights and hit up the markets in Phnom Penh, went to a floating village and stayed beachside at a bungalow in my town.

Kate was a real sport. She tried everything and as she says, “got out of her comfort zone.” The first time we traveled on a moto taxi we saw a bad wreck.  I’m on the back of the bike thinking, “Oh great she’s probably never going to get on one again,” but she did, and with no complaints. When we went to the floating village, little kids were chasing us around with boa constrictors, my sister hates snakes…  she even went up and down flights of  temple stairs so narrow that you literally had to climb on all fours.  I was so impressed with her willingness to try new things and to truly experience life here.  It was hard saying goodbye to her, but I feel so blessed to have a sister who will fly around the world just to visit. Seriously, she is the best. <3

                                                                Floating Village

After Kate left, it was back to work and I added a few new things to my classroom. We expanded our classroom library thanks to generous contributions from back home. We now have a writing station and each student has his/her own “mailbox” where they receive notes from teacher and from their friends. We even got a few real games, not handmade! I wish you all could see their faces when they get stuff “all the way from America” they are quite thrilled.

April also brought a lot of reflection on my part as I considered staying on here another year. It’s been such a challenging/rewarding time and it’s hard for me to think about leaving. I came here prepared to serve and as I did, I have been blessed more than I could have ever imagined.  I’ve decided right now I have to look for a job elsewhere due to the fact that I have to start paying back loans in June. I will stay on a bit longer to help with the summer school program and fly back home early September. I've put out resumes all over the world, so we'll see! (Note to people that might miss me a bit... don't worry, I plan on applying in the states too ;)

Medical Mission

Last Saturday, I went along with a team to a village on a medical trip. We boarded the big bus and drove over two hours away from home. We accessed the village by dirt roads,  because it was on the outskirts of a palm farm. Our destination was the small church that had twenty members; Dr. Baek and the nursing students set up their clinic and pharmacy inside the tiny church. People came from all over the village to get a check up and receive medication as needed. It was so awesome to see the smiles on people's faces as they walked out of the church with their medicine.

Eating lunch

No toys, no problem. These children were very creative.

Peeking in

Since the closest thing I have to medical knowledge are my two siblings who are physician's assistants, I stuck to doing hair. We had a nice little system down, a Korean couple washed the children's hair, my roommate, Camille cut and I combed and braided. The children were quite dirty so we had fun doing little "makeovers". When we first started, the children were shy and didn't smile much, but as we went along they got to know us, and before long they were climbing all over us, holding our hands, and giving us big bear hugs.

Hair washing

Our little smiley friend: He was so precious and looked sooo good with his new cut and comb :)

Not so happy....

....but there's a smile



Yay for being clean!



But back to sitting in the dirt! Ha.

Hugs <3

A flower for me?

We spent the late hours of the afternoon sitting on the church lawn singing songs and picking flowers. The children soon got dirty again as the afternoon wore on, but it didn't matter so much because our mission was accomplished, the children were cared for and smiling. Dr. Baek worked late in order to see all of the patients that showed up at the last minute. After everyone was taken care of, we took a group picture in front of the tiny church, loaded the bus and waved goodbye to our new friends.

Teaching and Learning

This week started out a bit rough. I had a few parent teacher conferences that didn't go as well as I had dreamed. I always imagined my first conferences as a teacher would be filled with glowing praise from parents who could barely contain their excitement that their children were doing so well in my class. Well... needless to say, reality was somewhat different.

In my student teaching placements I printed as much as I wanted, had access to whatever books I needed and had every manipulative and game a teacher could imagine; but this is Cambodia, and teaching here is an entirely different story. I have to be innovative and work with what I have. It's a challenge and I love it, but this week I let myself become frustrated.

I became discouraged that the only games my classroom has are ones I made from egg cartons and recycled cereal boxes. Instead of being thankful for all the amazing books I have, I thought about all the books that I would love for my students to have. After dwelling on everything that I didn't have, I felt despite the heart and soul I put into my job, it just wasn't enough.

So what would any girl do in such a situation? Why of course I wrote a tearful letter home to my mother. My first publicly shed tears in Cambodia, yes... I complained to my mom, a veteran teacher, that I had no clue what I was doing and that I felt I was failing my students. True to her nature, my mom wrote a very encouraging, "stop feeling sorry for yourself" letter. She told me that whenever I feel discouraged to look into the faces of my students, because they are the reasons I am teaching; of course, she was right. Just today I had a St. Patrick's Day lesson planned. We were going to cut out clovers and talk about the Father, Son and Holy Spirit. The craft didn't even get started because the children were so interested in the trinity and asking questions about going to heaven. For the next 45 minutes, our mixed group of Buddhists, atheists, and Christians talked about Jesus' love and what it means in our lives. As I sat on my plastic chair looking at the precious faces before me, I was once again filled with the purpose of why I came to teach in this country in the first place. Fears over my own inadequacies fell away in light of the fact that God is setting eternity in the hearts of my students.

I hope that you too will be encouraged, as I am every day, by these joyful faces :)

 

Peace